Staying Disabled

An Australian, an Irishman and a Scouser are in a bar. They're all staring at a man sitting on his own, at a table in the corner. He's so familiar, but not one of them recognise him, and they are getting annoyed. They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: "My God, it's Jesus!"

Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint. Thrilled, they send him over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a Smirnoff Ice.

Jesus accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the beverages slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus approaches the trio. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness.

When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: "My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!"

Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager. As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock.

"Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is completely gone! It's a miracle."

Jesus then approaches the Scouser who backs off and says, "Leave it out mate, I'm on disability benefit!"