Sorry Essex people, couldn't resist.

Essex Dictionary

Alma chizzit: A request to find the cost of an item.

Amaant: Quantity; sum total ("Thezza yuge amaant of mud in Saffend").

Assband: Unable to leave the house because of illness, disability etc.

Awss: A four legged animal, on which money is won, or more likely lost. ("That awss ya tipped cost me a fiver t'day").

Branna: More brown than on a previous occasion ("Ere, Trace, ya look branna today, ‘ave you been on a sunbed?").

Cort a Panda: A rather large hamburger.

Daan in the Marff- Unhappy ("Wossmatta, Trace? Ya look a bit daan in the marff").

Eye-Eels: Women's shoes

Furrock: The location of Lakeside Shopping Centre.

Garrij: A building where a car is kept or repaired (Trace: "Oi,Darren, I fink the motah needs ta go in the garrij cos it aint working proper").

Ibeefa: Balaeric holiday island.

Lafarjik: Lacking in energy ("I feel all lafarjik").

Oi oi!: Traditional greeting. Often heard from the doorway of pubs or during banging dance tunes at clubs.

Paipa: The Sun, The Mirror or The Sport.

Reband: The period of recovery and emotional turmoil after rejection by a lover ("I couldn't ‘elp it, I wuz on the reband from Craig").

Saffend: Essex coastal resort boasting the longest pleasure pier in the world. The place where the characters from TV's, popular soap opera, Eastenders go on holiday.

Tarn: The city of London, the big smoke.

Webbats: Querying the location, something or someone is. ("Webbats is me dole card Trace? I've gotta sign on).